TamraThings That Make You Go Eiuuuuuwww!!
January 29th 2008 10:49
Dear Reader,
You may have read some things on this site before. They may have related to parenting, modern family and life values, generations x,y and z, you may have found them entertaining and relevant, you may not. Well, I just want you to know, they were not written by me. I’ll take any reflected glory I can, but if you didn’t enjoy the site, then, rest assured, I didn’t write a single word.
Now is a different matter. I am the new blogger of this site. Yep, hard to believe but there’s another mother out there with a few opinions who’s willing to share. On this site I’m hoping to share with you bits of my brain left over post children, a few well oiled opinions on modern day life and parenting and let’s face it a rant on all the crazy stuff going on out there. Feel free to jump aboard. In fact I insist you jump aboard – the site is called parentdebates.
A bit of housekeeping before we get stuck in… Now, I really like the colour orange. I know some people do not. I can’t think why but to try and be a sensitive, conciliatory host, I’d like to make sure you are all comfortable before we begin. Well, I guess it’s already begun, but let’s not quibble. If you are finding this orangey site too much for your poor eyes, please advise asap. I am open to change.
Okay, now that you’re seated, met the hostess, let’s get started.
Cast your mind back a few years… Remember a time when you looked and felt pretty sharp, and the most pressing thing was being able to coordinate your outfit with your shoes? Or getting your hair just right. Or ironing? And I don’t mean other people’s clothes, I mean your own. Ahh...those were the days, weren't they?
And then came the children.
There's one thing for certain about parenting, it really gets you over yourself, doesn’t it? I mean, there’s no way you can appear suave in a busy bank queue whilst your newborn is emitting huge, gurgling sounds from their nappy, is there? Or when you get the call to come and get your child from pre-school / school due to the rampant head lice population that is busy staging an all class assault from its base on your little darling’s head. But, but, we’ve all stammered, I washed it last night and I gave her pigtails this morning, with blue ribbon!!
And then there’s the other horrible, grotesque things parents encounter, and I’m not just referring to comprehensive car insurance… Worms. The mere word sends a shiver down my back. Many a family meal at a restaurant has been irrevocably ruined by the loud proclamation and attendant scratching of your well-dressed youngest – MUM! My bottom’s itchy! Are you with me?
The list goes on. Toilet training. What a loaded statement that is! That scary time when they’re out of nappies…just. A swim at the pool at this precarious time, I'm sure you'll agree, is like windowshopping in the middle of Bazra. There's nothing that can clear the pool quicker than a small, unidentified object swimming painfully closely to your gorgeous, smiling toddler. I've seen other parents literally walk on water in their haste to disassociate themselves from said object and said offspring.
And then there’s the vomit. Were any of us told there would be so much of it!? It usually starts innocently enough with a bit of reflux, and then you’re on the long and windy road to travel sickness and endless cleaning of the car upholstery…never to get that new car smell again. Endless days and nights of 'having the bowl handy', as one child then two get “the bug”. I once counted six sheet changes in one night and no matter how competitive a parent you may be - this is a statistic you don’t ever want to try to beat.
And have any of you ever encountered a little thing called a ‘tantrum’? Say a 9.9 on the Richter scale? In public? Ah delightful. The commitment of your child to their thrashing, screaming and crying could almost be commended, except that you're probably conversely losing all self esteem, community sympathy and membership to the human race at the same feverish rate. Suddenly everyone else around you in the shop appears in complete control; all sporting Kylie Minogue single-raised eyebrows as they look down on you from their lofty, look-at-my-well-behaved-kids height and they all seem able to shop effortlessly with self-ironed clothes.
Yes, parenting can be gross. And sticky and icky and stinky. But an equally extraordinary thing is looking back and realising how far you’ve come. From supermodel to Florence Nightingale. Where once a broken nail may have brought you to your knees, now you’re doing triple shift with chickenpox, gastro and scraped knees. Your selflessness has expanded, perhaps at the same rate as the old waistband, perhaps not, but nonetheless you are now a fully qualified specialist in grossology, unfazed, unflappable and at times (after 5pm) a little unintelligible. Yep, in other words, a parent. Well done fellow traveller.
So, does any of this register with you? Tell us about the times when you've seriously thought about investing in pesticide/disinfectant shares. Till then, Yehaaaa!! Tamra
You may have read some things on this site before. They may have related to parenting, modern family and life values, generations x,y and z, you may have found them entertaining and relevant, you may not. Well, I just want you to know, they were not written by me. I’ll take any reflected glory I can, but if you didn’t enjoy the site, then, rest assured, I didn’t write a single word.
Now is a different matter. I am the new blogger of this site. Yep, hard to believe but there’s another mother out there with a few opinions who’s willing to share. On this site I’m hoping to share with you bits of my brain left over post children, a few well oiled opinions on modern day life and parenting and let’s face it a rant on all the crazy stuff going on out there. Feel free to jump aboard. In fact I insist you jump aboard – the site is called parentdebates.
A bit of housekeeping before we get stuck in… Now, I really like the colour orange. I know some people do not. I can’t think why but to try and be a sensitive, conciliatory host, I’d like to make sure you are all comfortable before we begin. Well, I guess it’s already begun, but let’s not quibble. If you are finding this orangey site too much for your poor eyes, please advise asap. I am open to change.
Okay, now that you’re seated, met the hostess, let’s get started.
Cast your mind back a few years… Remember a time when you looked and felt pretty sharp, and the most pressing thing was being able to coordinate your outfit with your shoes? Or getting your hair just right. Or ironing? And I don’t mean other people’s clothes, I mean your own. Ahh...those were the days, weren't they?
And then came the children.
There's one thing for certain about parenting, it really gets you over yourself, doesn’t it? I mean, there’s no way you can appear suave in a busy bank queue whilst your newborn is emitting huge, gurgling sounds from their nappy, is there? Or when you get the call to come and get your child from pre-school / school due to the rampant head lice population that is busy staging an all class assault from its base on your little darling’s head. But, but, we’ve all stammered, I washed it last night and I gave her pigtails this morning, with blue ribbon!!
And then there’s the other horrible, grotesque things parents encounter, and I’m not just referring to comprehensive car insurance… Worms. The mere word sends a shiver down my back. Many a family meal at a restaurant has been irrevocably ruined by the loud proclamation and attendant scratching of your well-dressed youngest – MUM! My bottom’s itchy! Are you with me?
The list goes on. Toilet training. What a loaded statement that is! That scary time when they’re out of nappies…just. A swim at the pool at this precarious time, I'm sure you'll agree, is like windowshopping in the middle of Bazra. There's nothing that can clear the pool quicker than a small, unidentified object swimming painfully closely to your gorgeous, smiling toddler. I've seen other parents literally walk on water in their haste to disassociate themselves from said object and said offspring.
And then there’s the vomit. Were any of us told there would be so much of it!? It usually starts innocently enough with a bit of reflux, and then you’re on the long and windy road to travel sickness and endless cleaning of the car upholstery…never to get that new car smell again. Endless days and nights of 'having the bowl handy', as one child then two get “the bug”. I once counted six sheet changes in one night and no matter how competitive a parent you may be - this is a statistic you don’t ever want to try to beat.
And have any of you ever encountered a little thing called a ‘tantrum’? Say a 9.9 on the Richter scale? In public? Ah delightful. The commitment of your child to their thrashing, screaming and crying could almost be commended, except that you're probably conversely losing all self esteem, community sympathy and membership to the human race at the same feverish rate. Suddenly everyone else around you in the shop appears in complete control; all sporting Kylie Minogue single-raised eyebrows as they look down on you from their lofty, look-at-my-well-behaved-kids height and they all seem able to shop effortlessly with self-ironed clothes.
Yes, parenting can be gross. And sticky and icky and stinky. But an equally extraordinary thing is looking back and realising how far you’ve come. From supermodel to Florence Nightingale. Where once a broken nail may have brought you to your knees, now you’re doing triple shift with chickenpox, gastro and scraped knees. Your selflessness has expanded, perhaps at the same rate as the old waistband, perhaps not, but nonetheless you are now a fully qualified specialist in grossology, unfazed, unflappable and at times (after 5pm) a little unintelligible. Yep, in other words, a parent. Well done fellow traveller.
So, does any of this register with you? Tell us about the times when you've seriously thought about investing in pesticide/disinfectant shares. Till then, Yehaaaa!! Tamra
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Comment by Harry
World Art
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I think having your first kid is what really makes you grow up yourself. You suddenly become responsible and "over yourself" as you put it. Quite a change for just about everyone.
Comment by Tamra
Parenting Debates
Comment by Harry
World Art
Sydney Diary
Personals
Video Games
Brisbane Diarystar
Films Found
Eco Travel Map